DEAR DEIDRE: MY boyfriend found out I’d been sexting somebody at the start of our relationship – now he doesn’t trust me.
I’m a woman of 25 and he’s 30. We met on a dating app.
My boyfriend found out I’d been sexting somebody at the start of our relationship
Keep up to date on social
For more Dear Deidre content, and to meet the team behind the infamous agony page, follow us on:
I had been on about 30 dates in the previous year. Sometimes I ended up having a one-night stand and other times you couldn’t get me away from the pub or restaurant fast enough. There are plenty of creeps out there.
But I met my partner and he seemed different. He didn’t want sex straight away or a friends-with-benefits arrangement.
He wanted to take his time getting to know me and it was so refreshing.
We went out five times during the first month and although we kissed, he didn’t push for sex. Eventually, he invited me as his plus-one to his best mate’s wedding.
We shared a room and, that night, I discovered he’s a really considerate lover. He made me feel incredible.
I had been chatting on and off to a guy I’d had a fling with during those first few weeks. He’s 27 and was always asking me to send naughty pictures, or describing what he’d like to do to me.
I didn’t take it seriously — it was just fun. But I did send some pretty revealing pictures, and lapped up the attention.
My relationship with my boyfriend started to develop and when we moved in together, I put an end to my naughty messages.
But I’d only been living with him for six weeks when a message from my serial sexter popped up, begging me to “send a fresh topless selfie”.
My boyfriend went mad. He fears I’ll always have a wandering eye.
Get in touch with Deidre
Every problem gets a personal reply, usually within 24 hours weekdays.
I’ll admit I do openly ogle other men, but I’ve tried to tell him the sexting guy is history.
I love my new man so much but worry I’ll lose him if I can’t stop looking at what else is out there.
DEIDRE SAYS: The solution is easy. Tell the sexter you’ve met somebody and don’t want to screw this up.
Explain to your new guy that you didn’t mean to hurt him and this other man is history. He’s the one you want to be with now, and ask him to give you a chance to put things right.
Your wandering eye may be because you’re attracted to good-looking men. But do remember those people aren’t necessarily right for you.
You’ve found yourself somebody who appears to give you the whole package, so make him your priority.
My support pack How To Look After Your Relationship is full of tips to ensure this relationship goes the distance.